How many times have you experienced someone reaching out via email or LinkedIn, asking to schedule a time to talk on the phone or over coffee, only to get into the conversation and realize that all they really wanted was to get you to introduce them to people you know so they could grow their business? If you’re like me, this has happened to you a lot, and you might be left wondering, “I’m growing my business, too. But how can I do that, when so many people are just trying to get me to introduce them to other people so they can grow their businesses?”

The “get” mentality in growing your business: “Gimme, gimme, gimme!” Gross.
The Get Mentality for Growing Your Business
The “get” mentality for growing your business is based on the fundamental philosophy, “I’m going to go out and get some business. I have to get people to send business my way.” It’s all about what you can get from other people and how you can get people to do what you want.
The problem with the get mentality is that it turns people off fast. In general, people don’t want to be sold. They want to buy, but they don’t want to be sold.
Just think of the last time you were in a store where the salesperson was overly pushy and imagine how you felt. Didn’t you want to leave, just to get away from that person? Even if you like what the store is selling, if the salesperson is all about making the sale and doesn’t understand the delicate balance between helping the customer and giving him or her the space needed to make a decision, you’ll feel uncomfortable and leave the store, rather than making a purchase.
The Give Mentality for Growing Your Business
In the “give” mentality, the philosophy is fundamentally different. It’s more about “What value can I provide to this person so that he or she feels like they’ve received honest value and they feel valued themselves?”
Many business owners misunderstand the “give” mentality and think that by rephrasing their sales conversation in such a way that they think about sales in terms of how they’re “giving” customers and clients the “gift” of working with them, or they actually ask people, “How can I help you?” which is actually just another way of saying, “What can I sell you?” Even when I hear people say, “How can I serve you?” it’s just another way to sell.
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Thank you for this reminder. I’m currently involved in a networking group that I’m finding to be more “get” oriented, and I’ve been trying to decide if I should continue with them…this makes things much more clear for me. Thank you.
Lora, I’m glad this article helped. I’ve had that same experience, though not for many years, since I started recognizing “get” in others a lot more easily. These days, I think it makes sense to look for others who are truly “give-minded” and forge a new networking group in that vein. Good luck!
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